Megan Rapinoe isnt here to make you comfortable

Posted by Fernande Dalal on Monday, August 5, 2024

It’s hard to keep count of all the polarizing ways that people describe Megan Rapinoe. The U.S. women’s soccer forward is a star, and she’s a pariah. She’s fun-loving, and she’s annoying. She’s exuberant, and she’s excessive. She’s a necessary voice, and she’s an irreverent troublemaker. She’s delightful, and she’s disgraceful. She’s essential to our World Cup hopes, and when she declines to sing “The Star-Spangled Banner” with her teammates, she’s inappropriate for our world-class ego.

She’s America, too, by the way. Oh, she’s America. And there is no counter to that.

Rapinoe is just a person unafraid to express the good, bad and unflinchingly ugly in our diverse and complicated country, and that allows her to be a mirror. The way you react to Rapinoe reflects an image of America. It can be depressing to see, but at least it is true. This is the point of her audacity, of her declaration that she is a “walking protest.” She forces you to care.

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Members of the U.S. women's national soccer team talk about their fight for gender equality ahead of the Women's World Cup in France. (Video: The Washington Post, Photo: Toni L. Sandys/The Washington Post)

Love or hate her, celebrate with or root against her, dig or diss her colorful hairstyles. She’s still going to represent the United States and do so with athletic grace and grit. She’s still the woman who scored two goals on penalty kicks to lead the U.S. team past Spain and into the World Cup quarterfinals. You will pay attention to her, and if you’re not too busy listening to your own voice, perhaps you will learn something.

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So let’s add the two most accurate descriptions of Rapinoe: gifted and unavoidable. Her presence on this team makes her too good to be ignored. For the past 20 years, the U.S. women’s national team has been one of sports’ greatest forces for gender equality and female empowerment. The roster changes and the results vary, but a gold standard of performance remains.

Going back even before the legendary 1999 squad, there has been a special combination that binds the program: sense of mission and embrace of individuality. Many believe there’s almost a mindless submission of self required to make a team work. It’s the all-for-one, one-for-all theory. In reality, that decision is a conscious one, and the best teams remember that they are a group of individuals, not an easily homogenized creation.

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The acceptance and appreciation of difference create the strongest team bond. They establish the connection that allows teammates to compete for something even greater than a championship. Talk to any of the women from 1999 — Mia Hamm, Briana Scurry, Julie Foudy, Brandi Chastain, Michelle Akers and the rest — and they will articulate how different yet alike they were flexible enough to be.

It is easy to disagree with Rapinoe’s actions and declare her a bad teammate or a bad American. But her defiance exemplifies the U.S. women’s soccer tradition. This program was built on personality, distinct characters and outspokenness. It was built on trailblazing. And it was built, through excellence, on combating prejudiced views of what’s possible and what’s proper for female athletes. The ongoing fight for equal pay is one important example. Rapinoe is helping with that fight and waging some battles of her own against other types of injustice, including her mission to strengthen LGBTQ rights. Her stances don’t make her different from her teammates and a detriment to this great soccer program. They verify that she is a product of a revolutionary tradition.

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Inevitably, Rapinoe became a recipient of President Trump’s admonishment this week for opting not to sing the national anthem with her teammates. Athletes peacefully protesting during the anthem is his pet sports issue, and if you haven’t been paying attention in the past few years, you need only search Rapinoe’s name on Twitter to catch up on why. Patriotism is a complex concept, but for many, it is a sacrilegious act to behave in any manner deemed improper during the anthem and before the American flag.

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The topic is so uncomfortable, which is what Rapinoe wants. After Colin Kaepernick began his kneeling protest three years ago, Rapinoe became the first prominent white or female athlete to do the same before a Seattle Reign match in September 2016. In response to her protest, the National Women’s Soccer League and U.S. Soccer Federation have spelled out their policies and tried to curtail Rapinoe’s acts. But she has continued to express herself in various forms. Standing tight-lipped during the anthem is essentially a compromise, but the image continues to look rebellious.

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During the World Cup, the pride of country turns excessive and magnifies such a stance. As much as I love these international sporting events, they also make me feel queasy because of the potential for jingoism. There is no single way to be American.

Rapinoe isn’t anti-American for refusing to smile and sing through her disappointment. She’s simply a disappointed American. But few ever ask why and listen to her concerns. Instead, they make ridiculous statements about waiting for a proper time to protest. When is the time right? When no one’s paying attention? When no one’s around to feel uncomfortable?

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The point of civil disobedience is to make the ignoring stop.

For those who want Rapinoe to shut up and kick because she makes a good living and enjoys a level of freedom that other countries don’t have, perhaps Rapinoe should write “SORRY” into her hair the next time she wants to change her ’do. Society cannot advance if the fortunate declares selfishly: “I’ve got it pretty good. Best wishes to the rest of y’all.”

It takes a privileged person to speak to privilege. “You’ve got it good” shouldn’t be a pacifier. It should be a motivator to help others have it better. Rapinoe wants more for herself and for others, and that’s the kind of compassionate pursuit of success that should make you want to sing.

Let’s not lionize Rapinoe. She is flawed, and she probably can point out her shortcomings faster than you can, especially on the field. She’s not an athletic martyr like Kaepernick because she’s still playing the sport she loves. But she is an essential rebel: a defiant woman refusing to play by the antiquated be-cute-and-courteous rules that make many men feel better about female athletes. She is a societal disrupter, born of a program of societal disrupters, and thank heavens that this individual decided to join forces with this team.

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Rapinoe chooses to stand out, but it doesn’t diminish the love and gratitude she feels when representing the United States. It is an amazing honor, and it is also an earned one. She wasn’t drawn from a hat. She’s one of the best in the world at her craft, and as lucky as she is to be on the squad, the team is just as lucky to have her.

Disagree with her? Fine. But there she is, striving to add to our women’s soccer prestige. She’s America. Like her or not, Rapinoe is going to represent us, and all of our spectacular complications. She is a mirror, unflattering, uncomfortable. Unavoidable.

For more by Jerry Brewer, visit washingtonpost.com/brewer.

Read more on the U.S. women’s national team and the Women’s World Cup:

‘Winning by any means possible,’ U.S. grinds past Spain to World Cup quarterfinals

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Better early than never: U.S.-France is a World Cup quarterfinal with big-time stakes

Jill Ellis quietly sits at the heart of U.S. juggernaut in Women’s World Cup

U.S. soccer players keep World Cup separate from lawsuit, but they’re scoring in both

The U.S. women’s national team fights for equal pay as team begins Women’s World Cup defense

The U.S. women’s national team’s joy is only rivaled by the exuberance of its fans

Spain’s pro clubs are investing in women’s soccer, and it’s paying off in the World Cup

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